My happy days are busy ones
And boy oh boy have I had a lot of happy, happy days lately.
June was it's usual blur but for unusual reasons and when the first little person walks through the doors of Gardens Children's Centre tomorrow morning all that blur will have it's very happy and satisfied fulfillment.
And apart from work, my personal life was very busy too and contained some pretty hard personal moments I had to dig deep to find the energy and grace to face and then keep on going.
Quite suddenly at 1pm today I found myself home...alone...and likely to be that way for the remainder of the day.
And I took a deep breath, put on a load of laundry and cracked open my laptop.
I had a solid couple of hours to catch up on email correspondence, write a report, review my calendar, review a proposal I need to complete this week. It felt so good to work away at the list in my head that has been popping into my late night thoughts. Every now and then a brown lab would come over and rest his head on my thigh and look up at me with his big brown six year old eyes just to prove that when one has a dog one is never really alone. I really do appreciate his presence in my life and in our home.
And as I flipped the laundry, made the bed with fresh, new linen, cleaned the bathroom, swept the hallway I felt my chest expanding, the air filling more and more of my lungs.
I went to water my veggies, trying to save my tomato bushes from the ravages of the windstorm last night, smelling the warm earth and the water and the plants, listening to the chatter but feeling pleasantly detached from it.
After some groceries I came home and with only myself to feed, the sun warm on the patio and wind having died right down I sat down to dinner with just my thoughts and feelings. No agenda, no conversation, no expectations, no obligations (and only a tiny bit of guilt for the lack of veggies on my plate). The sun was shining through the hanging basket and leaned back in my chair and breathed deeply.
Having missed the gym this morning I decided a long walk was in order and I took myself and my thought bubble to my beloved dyke - dappled sunlight warm on my skin, the tiny breeze cool and welcome, the smell of BBQ's, the odd Canada flag still flapping on a fence, flowers, dogs, voices, little puffs of dust as I walked along.
And so these hours come to an end as my boy is headed home from his day at the beach with friends - I am sure he'll be full of all the happenings and we'll chat until it's dark out.
And I will crawl into my fresh sheets tonight missing fisherman Al but feeling like I can do July.
My breath is caught, my head is up and my heart is ready.
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