"WHAT?"

I am back from the deaf.

Yes you read that right.....

I SAID YES YOU READ THAT RIGHT.....

Oh man.....what a week.

What a mess a little bit of water can make in your ear.

My left ear was rendered useless for most of the week and I was a miserable person.

I had no idea how loud I was speaking, I had to look for clues in the faces of the people I was speaking too.....if they drew back and their pupils widened I realised I was too loud.  If they leaned in or furrowed their brows I realised I was too quiet.

It was annoying for everyone.

But mostly for me.

Because I could hear absolutely everything going on in my body........

I was suddenly aware of the sound of my own breathing....

Chewing was like having my very own jack hammer in my head.....(although I was slightly relieved not hear any actual voices from in there! HA)

A sneeze was like an earthquake (or so I imagine)

I most definitely could hear my jaw clenching and unclenching.......the grinding of my teeth (which happens rather more often than I realised)

Lying down at night I could hear my blood....I am not kidding you....I could hear it....pulsing around my body....

It kept me awake   - stupid pounding pulse....

I KNOW RIGHT!

I am mostly mortified that a minor issue like a blocked ear could bother me SO MUCH.

What a wimp!!!

If I was two I would have thrown back my head and given full vent to my frustration but seeing as I am 42 (ish) I felt I needed to be a bit braver.

But it was hard.

When the Doctor syringed out my ear and I could hear again I wanted to dance a little jig right there in the office.

Until she decided the other never blocked ear could use a clean out and promptly blocked it.

I could not believe that I only been undeaf for ONE  minute .... the jig died...... right there...

I think she could see from my crazed look that it would be unhelpful to send me out into the general population so she gave it her full attention and after a good deal of effort she unplugged the ear.

OH MY WORD!

I cannot tell you how relieved I was, how joy-filled to have two working ears.

I practically skipped back to work.

Isn't is amazing how much we take our bodies for granted and how something so small can derail things.... or is that just me?

I'll take the lesson (again) to appreciate this imperfect body of mine that has many things about it I do not like or enjoy but it works for the most part and for that I am truly grateful.